Ever grown tired of those commercials, where some attention whore from Hollywood―looking all serious and shit, drinking highly expensive bottled water made out of elephant’s testicle sweat―asks for a hefty donation to help some unfortunate motherfuckers who’ll use the money to fund their next home-made genocide? At the same time, MySpace-age teenagers are wearing corpse paint, listening to satanic black metal bands like Bullet for my Valentine or the NSBM-sympathizing Green Day, tears pouring down their life-hardened faces as they write the next milestones in poetry about how they’re feeling inside. It all makes me wonder where is the justice – why are the innocent dead and the guilty alive? Why isn’t Dolph Lundgren doing anything at all?!

While the toughest Soviet boxer―of all time―has gone AWOL, his fellow country men in Sweden, F.K.Ü (Freddy Krueger’s Ünderwear), are doing their best to inject the ass kicking of the 80’s back to our miserable, politically correct, lives. The Håkans’ latest output Sometimes they come back… to Mosh has been long overdue, as the previous full-length, goat-sodomized, effort (known as) Metal Moshing Mad was already released back in the late 90s.

Don Johnsson might be a has-been nowadays, but he too would realize the name of the game when the word “mosh” is being thrown around in such quantities. It’s no secret F.K.Ü are continuing the legacy of humorous metal thrashing mad bands like S.O.D and Nuclear Assault. Of course, those two ain’t the only ones in the mix, as there’s hints of death metal and other things of such nature in the cake. It’s not about trying to sound like something or someone – but about bringing the right goods to the kitchen for the ultimate moshing experience. And seeing how Nuclear Assault wasn’t able to bring the mosh to the table with their “comeback” album, there’s been a demand for a good afternoon mosh moment. Luckily for us, F.K.Ü goes beyond call of duty.

There are songs dedicated to pop-culture-enthusiasts, as songs like “Agent Amy Steel” and “Grave Robbing Mania” (about the infamous lover of all time, Karen Greenlee), “Fury 58” (about a certain red car) and “Four Fingers Fatal to the Flesh” (with some nicely laid out grinding moments) might indicate. Then there are those great ‘gone in a second’-crushers like “Paraskevidekatriaphobia” (4s) and “C.H.Ü.D., Pt. 2” (11s) – not forgetting the killer interlude “F.K.Ü. Says NO” (41s). Besides those, the rest of the album pretty much consists of songs about moshing (“Disciples of the Mosh”), killing (“Maniac Cop”), death and torture that are accompanied by riffs and grooves that make you, dare I say it, want to mosh. The only thing that I was left without was a blues tune. But I suppose the Tankard cover “Zombie Attack” might make up for it.

Plenty of diversity within limits to make this 44-minute monument of mosh varied, interesting and worth of your bulging beer-gut. Hell – even Robert Englund appears in the booklet so that alone should erase pretty much all doubt about the quality of this album.

With Sometimes They Come Back… to Mosh F.K.Ü makes maiming and necrophilia fun for the whole family – and they do it with such quality that I don’t even feel bad about touring kindergartens to educate the kids on the matter.

So all that remains is for you to go and mosh yourself! Buy this shit.

[Visit the band's website]

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