I;m surprised how often I put a CD in my player and wonder how any group of musicians could listen to the finished product and say, “man, we really nailed it. That’s exactly what we were going for.” This is one of those moments.

Big Trouble in Little China is the kind of three-chord rock act that you’d find at the average frat party where everyone in the crowd is enjoying it because they’re drunk – really, really drunk. I’m talking sick for days drunk. Maybe that’s where they came up with the song title “Drunk as Fuck.” It’s a collection of 1980s influenced three-chord semi-punk, and vocalist Geoff McKinnon sounds like he’s drunk himself most of the time, doing an awful Johnny Rotten impression. Then there are the “creative” song titles like “End of the World Sex Party” and “Piss Proud.” More like piss poor.

The only tracks here with any redeeming qualities are “Slave to Your Rock ‘n’ Roll” and “Everyone for Themselves and God Against All” which do open with decent garage rock riffs. It doesn’t last long, though. I’ve always been a friend to garage bands, having been in a few myself, but if this one was playing next door to me, I’d have to consider calling the cops myself.

If you’re looking for a band for your next frat kegger, Big Trouble in Little China would probably fit the bill as well as anyone. At least they sound like they’re having a good time. If you’re looking for musicianship and songwriting, stay as far away as possible.

[Visit the band's website]

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